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RE: Noise

Black Dog — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 15:08:54 GMT

If I Recall/Remember Correctly.

Yup, they were certainly robust. A mate had a CZ125 and it was awesome. Never let him down, and you could do a full service with a nail file and a couple of hairgrips. The hammer was for running repairs.

Whereas my Jawa - from the same factory and it seemed the same basic design - was the most unreliable, soul-shrinking pile of wombat poo that I have ever seen. Ridiculous design, shockingly poor materials, put together by retards on a kopeck a day.

Strange.

RE: Noise

Number 6 — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 14:38:10 GMT

Black Dog (14/03/2007)

[quote]Number 6 (13/03/2007)

Or was it the black CZ175

Already customised. They only came from the factory in green and red colourways.

IIRC, obviously.[/quote]

Ah, but they didn't come as standard with the natty sticker - that was the highlight of my personalised steed. Actually both MZ and CZ (I owned one of each) were pretty decent bikes for hacking around -better than throwing the plastic fantastic down the road mid-winter anyway - most fixes could be effected with a small hammer.

What is IIRC?

RE: Noise

Black Dog — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 14:15:22 GMT

Number 6 (13/03/2007)

Or was it the black CZ175

Already customised. They only came from the factory in green and red colourways.

IIRC, obviously.

RE: Noise

Number 6 — Tue, 13 Mar 2007 14:30:23 GMT

Top work Mr Dog!

Apart from my dashed dream of turning the Z200 Custom back into a road bike, and sticking noisy cans on an FZ, the only top notch custom-job to my credit is sticking a Kawasaki 'Red Rovolution' sticker on the side panel of my lovely green MZ TS125. Or was it the black CZ175 (remind please, Mr Black).

Either way it was a hilarious dual-level ironic statement and everybody laughed. Maybe. Oh happy days.

RE: Noise

Black Dog — Mon, 12 Mar 2007 15:36:51 GMT

Oh, and I forgot the twin red air-horns mounted either side of the headlight.

I gave one old guy in Leeds heart failure when he tried a bit of careless lane-changing on a roundabout with his window open (see thread on mobile phones). My front end was RIGHT alongside his door and 12 inches away.

Excellent.

RE: Noise

Black Dog — Mon, 12 Mar 2007 15:31:29 GMT

Number 6 (12/03/2007)So here's the question - what is the most crap bike ever customised by forum folk?

OK, how's this for starters:

A Jawa 634 model (maroon 350 two-stroke twin), which was the victim of rust, poor quality components and a young owner who wanted something "different" but couldn't afford the XR750 flat-tracker that Bike magazine raved about as the Next Big Thing in 1975.

Motor rebuilt on new bearings and pistons, with matt black exhaust paint on the fins
Exhaust headers shot-blasted and painted with red exhaust paint
Reverse-cone megaphone exhausts
Frame and mudguards stripped and painted gloss black
Tank and side panels stripped and painted blue (actually these last two were rather good)
Original bars scrapped and ace bars fitted - upside down
Wide Dunlop K70s to replace the original plastic tyres (front same section as rear, à la Harley)

It was a custom job in the sense that I customised it to my own taste, which was a) horrible, and b) constrained by having no money. The ace bars were narrow, high and raked steeply back when fitted like that, but were surprisingly OK to ride with - better than the low and wide originals which were more like a reminder of a Russian tractor of 1951. It actually looked quite cool, if I say so myself, and the young lad who bought it off me was thrilled.

However, I now know that reverse-cone megas are for FOUR-STROKES and that two-strokes need SPANNIES, and therefore why the performance was totally sh1t afterwards. Remember, we didn't have the interweb thing in them days - just local parts suppliers who put their profits above helping out a clueless newbie. I did learn quite a lot doing it, mind.

I did the work in the summer of 76, when Britain had the longest drought for centuries. I was dying to get it finished so that I could go out and tear round the Yorkshire Dales in the hot summer weather. It had taken about 3 months in my parents' garage. One night I actually tightened the last bolt and then went to bed planning all the wonderful places I would go the next day, the bends I would swing through, the women I would impress. That night, the drought broke, and for the next three weeks, it p1ssed down.

I blame Labour and that Harold Wilson.

RE: Noise

Number 6 — Mon, 12 Mar 2007 14:15:05 GMT

scalini (10/03/2007)

there's still a plaque in Thomas Pea****e showing Alan Crouch and Mark Chapman as head boys, a lot closer to 73 than we are now. And I've chopped a Z200 so don't talk to me about decent bikes....obviously.

Still a plaque! Blimey, didn't know there ever was such a thing. The esteemed lads are no doubt benefitting from their superior placement in that little microcosm of society. Probably. Who cares?

I once considered buying an original pre-chopped Z200 chop, but couldn't bring myself to do it. I had all these great plans to reverse engineer it (well, stick on some flat bars and a decent seat) back into a street bike, but realised the faintly beating heart of a tacky Jap custom would still be lurking unseen beneath. I couldn't live with that.

So here's the question - what is the most crap bike ever customised by forum folk?

RE: Noise

scalini — Sat, 10 Mar 2007 22:05:17 GMT

RE: Noise

Number 6 — Fri, 09 Mar 2007 13:38:02 GMT

Dunno! But I do know you are wrong about the Fatherland's contribution to popular music. Have you no ear for Klaus Schulze, Ashra, Can, Neu!, Kraftwerk, Popol Vuh et al? Very important stuff - just ask Julian Cope. Rammstein entertain, I agree, but shouty German metal funsters are but one aspect of our Teutonic cousins' creativity. And don't tell me you never wallowed in Tangerine Dream's electronic mindscapes! Go and get into it. You will be happy you did.

Hang on. Isn't this forum s'posed to be about bikes? I know of a nice little pre-war German rally (Raleigh) that might interest you. hahahahah (courtesy of Denis Pennis, before you ask...but the link was all mine).

Now go and check your mudguards for lurking deposits of darkness - very corrosive.

RE: Noise

roadhoover — Tue, 06 Mar 2007 09:25:12 GMT

p.s Roland? Man in black? Browning? Mr. King? whossat all about?

RE: Noise

roadhoover — Tue, 06 Mar 2007 09:23:34 GMT

Indeed I still dwell occasionally in a Kingdom of Madness, recorded after 1973 so therefore rather good. I venture that you may be in a minority with your penchant for masturbatory plank twiddling gittar pointlessness. You'll be telling me that Tangerine Dream were good next. Now that would be crossing the Rubicon. It worked for Julias who as we all know was a bit of a trend setter. But I also venture that despite the inherent hegemony contained within the German psyche, their world music domination failed miserably. I'll come clean in admitting to owning an album but only to remind myself never to buy another. Now Rammstein they're a different kettle of fish altogether.

Blinkered sweeping statements from self proclaimed god fearing men has always caused strife down through the ages.

Glad to hear the GSX has been dragged from the pit, the creosote should stop the original poor finish deteriorating further and mask the smell of burning oil.

Still no news from the marsh.

RE: Noise

Number 6 — Mon, 05 Mar 2007 14:12:41 GMT

[quote][b]Mr Black (27/02/2007) got your GSX 250 ES back on the road yet.

Yes it is back on the road and I have customised it with a natty set of ape-hangers and a smart King & Queen seat. And I have painted it with creosote. And have added some spokie-dokies. Nice.

Pleased to hear you think my entire collection of two-wheelers was rubbish - your valid contribution to the field of aesthetics only serves to assure me that I am right not to touch a motor-bicycle ever again, since I will surely only make a crass judgement and end up with something rather silly, like an FZ750 or a erm..nope, that was about the only really cred thing I ever owned. The green machine that road hoover talks of above was pretty good though, eh? Who's got the photo of its demise?

Yours sincerely etc

PS Roadhoover - your comments on 1973 music are spoken out of ignorance and can be dismissed. You still a Magnum fan, by the way?

RE: Noise

roadhoover — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 09:29:59 GMT

p.s best bike you had was that green GPZ and you lobbed that. There were witness's. I believe there are even pictures lurking somewhere. Where are they?

RE: Noise

roadhoover — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 09:25:50 GMT

What a load of old tosh, most things before '73 were crap (naturally there are a few notable exceptions but to make a sweeping statement like that Reverend is plain wrong).

Look forward to the first post from the marshman

RE: Noise

Mr Black — Tue, 27 Feb 2007 16:37:12 GMT

Number 6 (27/02/2007)

That's right Herr Black! Everything written, played, recorded, produced etc etc after December 31st 1973 is crap, as well you know. Oh no, hang on, Take That were actually rather good. They write all their own material you know. Next!

Did you know that Levitation was the first digitally recorded album in the uk ? Or may be the WORLD !!

God I hate rain...., got your GSX 250 ES back on the road yet....oh wasn't I suppose to mention that ? Oh that's right you've got the good people on this site to believe you don't ride anymore which, considering the festering pile of plop that was any bike you've ever owned ever, is tantamount to the same thing ! There, I said it...

PS Blue Poofta Bike is set to join the forum soon and yes, that will be his site name.

RE: Noise

Number 6 — Tue, 27 Feb 2007 14:22:35 GMT

RE: Noise

Mr Black — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 15:11:37 GMT

So Next by Alex Harvey is crap then is it?

Blimey, change your mind like the wind No 6 don't yer ?

RE: Noise

Number 6 — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 14:53:23 GMT

Seventies actually. 'Everybody knows great music stopped in the 1973.' (Homer Simpson)

RE: Noise

Black Dog — Mon, 12 Feb 2007 10:30:00 GMT

Number 6 (09/02/2007)

Actually, I'd rather listen to some smooth jazz. Or Hawkwind.

Warning! Sixties alert!

RE: Noise

Number 6 — Fri, 09 Feb 2007 12:38:54 GMT

Actually, I'd rather listen to some smooth jazz. Or Hawkwind.

RE: Noise

Mr Black — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 09:22:40 GMT

I always thought a GT750 kettle with a three into one piper with no baffles was your particular aural datum point, compare your sanitised v twin four stroke ( with oh so naughty cans ) to that...

RE: Noise

Number 6 — Tue, 23 Jan 2007 15:02:10 GMT

Actually Mr Dog says it all when he talks of the infernal combustion engine having to be on full chat to make its aural mark.

Now, I have never been to a bike GP but I have seen a few car F1 GPs (in the dim and distant past when they were actually interesting to watch - Senna, Mansell, Prost, Piquet all on the same grid - aaah!). The sound of 20,000 horses (or thereabouts) being shot out of the stalls all at once is the sound to end all sounds. Even better than a Tornado GR1 making a vertical assent.

Do they still make Captain Sensible Motad exhausts? Good quality, but oh so quiet. Zzzzzzzz.

RE: Noise

Mazz — Tue, 23 Jan 2007 12:34:39 GMT

I've got to say my fave noise has to be a Harley. You always know it's a Harley when you hear it thumping towards you.

Beautiful sound.

Most annoying sound though is the sound of 50cc's who think that by blipping the throttle, it sounds like you're changing gear and you're not riding a one geared broken hairdryer. Not mocking 50cc riders in general (everyone has to start somewhere) just those who think they sound cool!

RE: Noise

Black Dog — Mon, 22 Jan 2007 12:48:54 GMT

Here's my opinion on bike noises:

Big single - great noise
V-twin - great noise
Parallel twin - great noise
Triple - great noise
Jap in-line four - great noise
Jap V4 - great noise
In-line six - great noise
Two-stroke twin - great noise

Classics, modern, whatever. All provided that they are being ridden correctly (which may not be the same manner in each case) and blessed with a decent pipe and can. Shudder, hammer, rumble, wail, trumpet, scream, howl - it don't matter. What matters is someone is giving it maximum beans and having fun.

If it sounds like a wet fart or a Nissan Micra wrapped in cotton wool, it ain't a motorsickle.

One of the best and most memorable biking experiences of my life was listening to the classic bike racing from Cadwell in about 1989. I couldn't see for the crowds (I arrived late) so I lay on my back in the sunshine and just listened. The race of classic 500cc four-strokes against 250cc 2-strokes was sheer music - descants, baritones, basses all in a kind of manic harmony. Who needs drugs?

RE: Noise

roadhoover — Thu, 18 Jan 2007 09:58:29 GMT

Number Six, you have been busy. All is not lost, you may have left the fold, but I can tell 'do as you liking' is still in your blood, with the advent of global warming bikes and scoots surely have to be the future of personal transport before the inevitable darkness of petrol and oil reserve depletion sucks us into the quiet and un-assuming world of global friendly electrically powered motation.

I would have to disagree on the Jap multi opinion to an extent. Don't get me wrong, the raucous howl of a Jap missile being given the berries is a heart racing sound especially vented through a quality race muffler and ridden by someone who knows their stuff and is prepared to bury the needle deep into the redline through the gears, but...........

Despite the factt that I ride a Jap 4, I had a brief foray into the world of V-twins and whilst a completely different sound (not quite so manic) it was an aural delight. I had a TLR equipped with Yoshi race mufflers, I ventured on a marathon road trip a few years ago accompanied by two pals also sporting race can equipped TL's and the sound we made bombing down the auto routes of the continent was like a squadron of German bombers flying under the radar overhead. I remember we majestically swept past a kiddie in France on a TS125, he was giving it the big squeeze, jacket balooning and filthing his way with blue smoke, we were keen to catch the ferry so were shifting, the kid visibly jumped as we swept past in close formation, the poor kid must have thought a squadron of Spitfires were up his ****, truly a tremendous sensation of V-twin power pulsing through you and a fantastic accompanying soundtrack. Everybody got well out of our way all trip (apart from ironically enough an Audi RS6, who had the temerity to flash his lights for us to move over whilst negotiating the Bay of Genoa from Pisa to Monaco, but that's another story).

What about the wail and clatter of a two stroke HMMM? Singles I agree the sound of a big mono thumper whilst stirring doesn't compare to the others, it's more in the useability for a single, try riding a big Yam WR400 or similar on the dirt, that is a fantastic experience, you can really feel the shove in the small of your back.

I think it's horses for courses and the sound should be secondary to the usage, sound being just one part of the whole experience. Get it while you can, with Euro 3 firmly ensconced and type approval and other associated propose baylox being pushed through, ear plugs will become redundant and a thing of the past.

'Being shot out of a cannon will always be better than squeezed out of a tube. That is why God made fast motorcycles'

Noise

Number 6 — Wed, 17 Jan 2007 14:39:50 GMT

Right you lot. This one is about noise. Don't bother correct me if I'm wrong; you just can't beat the noise of a Japanese four with a set of decent sports cans, sceaming its little valves out on the redline. Deep grunting singles and twins are alright, if you must, but they hardly get the blood going, do they? That's a hypothetical question by the way. You know I'm right.